The Night of the Obvious Solution
by BarkingatJim
Summary: Summary: Someone has carried out a theft under extraordinary circumstances. Jim and Artie are assigned to solve the crime but find they need a little help from their friends.
1. Chapter 1

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 1

" **What does that mean in English?"**

 _This story is dedicated to Andamogirl who has both been supportive of my writing and supplied the French dialogue._

 _In a restaurant in a small town somewhere in America_

"Je n'en peux plus! (I can't take any more!)"

Francois Lebeau threw the plate he was in the middle of washing up into the sink, sending a spray of water up in the air, and wiped his hands dry on a nearby cloth. Anyone meeting LeBeau for the first time would consider his name inappropriate but once they had had time to observe his features when animated, transformed by his winning smile and his enthusiasm for life they would quickly change their mind. At those times he was indeed as handsome as his name implied.

"No more can I do this!" he exclaimed. "The food here, she is filthy and unworthy to touch the clean water with which I wash her from these dishes so cheap."

He removed his apron and threw it to the floor. "J'en ai assez! J'arrête! (I quit!)" he said as he strode from the kitchen past the amazed stares of his co workers. "Au revoir!" he threw behind him, grabbing his jacket from a peg near the back door as he went outside.

He was just in time to catch sight of the man he had watched leave the restaurant a few moments earlier, who he knew as Mason. Whether that was his real name or not, he didn't know and it didn't really matter. What did matter was who Mason was on his way to meet. His quarry had stopped to roll himself a cigarette and was only fifty yards or so away. He was heavy set and dressed in the unexceptional uniform of the cowboy, canvas trousers, shirt, leather waistcoat and boots. He was wearing a hat and had knotted a kerchief casually around his neck. The man struck a match on the bottom of his boot and lit the roll-up before walking away in the direction of the saloon. Lebeau followed him.

Lebeau strolled up to the bar, all the time keeping an eye on his quarry who had joined a man at one of the tables at the back. From his clothing the other man looked like he belonged out East and Lebeau wondered what he was doing there. He needed to find out his name as soon as possible and wondered where they were both staying. There was only one hotel in town but there were rooms available at the saloon too. The Easterner was probably staying at the hotel and Lebeau wondered if he could get a job there, now he was no longer employed at the restaurant. He waited at the bar until the two men parted. The cowboy went upstairs and the other left the saloon. Lebeau followed the Easterner out into the street and when he had made sure he was headed for the hotel he went to the livery stable to collect his horse and leave town to ride in the direction of the railroad.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _The Wanderer – a little later_

"Hi Artie, find out anything?" James West asked. He had been studying a telegraph message when his partner arrived back at the train.

'Francois Lebeau' threw himself onto the nearest couch and put his legs up on a stool. "Mason had lunch at the restaurant. I followed him from there to the saloon where he met another man. I need to change my disguise and see about getting a job at the hotel, see what I can find out about him." He looked pointedly at his partner. "It will be an improvement on washing dirty dishes."

"You should have gotten a job as a waiter," Jim pointed out.

"There were no vacancies so I would have had to bribe one of the waiters to let me take their place and evidently there wasn't any money for that."

"Yeah I do remember you asking now." Jim said. "But there won't be any need for you to get another job; we're leaving here first thing in the morning."

"But..." Artie began, standing up.

"A telegraph message arrived from Colonel Richmond. We're needed in Washington."

It was then Artie noticed the piece of paper lying on the table where Jim was standing. "But what about our assignment?"

"They're sending two agents to replace us. Colonel Richmond asked that we write a report of what we've found out so far. You'd better make sure it's completed before we leave in the morning."

"Have a heart," Artie said. "I've been cleaning dishes all day."

"Excellent, you won't need to wash your hands before you get started on dinner," Jim replied. "Let me know when it's ready. I'll be cleaning my gun."

Artie said something in French that was very rude and stormed off to the galley.

"What does that mean in English?" Jim shouted.

"The same as it does in French!" Artie shouted back.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Washington DC – Colonel Richmond's Office_

"Thank you for your report, Artemus," Colonel Richmond said. "Tom Montgomery and Earl Thompson have taken over the assignment. They just finished a job in Arizona so I forwarded the report to them and they should be in place by now."

The two agents were sitting opposite the Colonel, still wondering why they had been recalled to Washington.

"In pulling us out you've taken the risk of losing sight of our quarry, Colonel" Jim said. "Whatever the reason is you recalled us to Washington it must be pretty important."

"It is," Richmond replied, "it involves the security of the Government, maybe even the country."

"With respect, Sir, that could apply to quite a few of our assignments," Artie pointed out.

Richmond's smile was strained as he said, "very true, Artemus, however the facts of the case I want you to look into defies explanation and I fear we may have an insoluble mystery on our hands. But if we don't solve the mystery and find out who is behind it then…well we just have to, that's all."

The expressions on the agents' faces betrayed their concern.

"You can count on us, Sir," Artie said.

"I know, gentlemen. First of all I though it might be helpful for you to talk with Dr Walter Shelby, as he witnessed it first-hand."

"Witnessed what?" Jim couldn't help asking.

"That is part of the mystery," Richmond replied. He went to the door and opened it. "Would you like to come in, Dr Shelby?" he said to the man waiting outside.

A tall man with grey hair, moustache and neatly trimmed beard nervously entered the room. He scanned the agents' faces as he walked over to the chair indicated by the Colonel and sat down in it. His expression was one of doubt that he would be believed and it was no wonder he felt that way when he finally told his story.

Shelby gave a slight cough and began to speak.

"I am a scientist working for the Government on weapons development," he began.

"The best in his field," Richmond said. "And I might add that he has my complete trust."

Dr Shelby nodded in acknowledgment of the Colonel's support and relaxed a little as he continued speaking.

"A few days ago I went to my office to work on some blueprints – a plan for a new type of large gun. The blueprints are as you can imagine top secret. On the day in question I had stepped out of my office for a moment. I left te blueprints on my desk but I locked the door behind me. When I returned and unlocked my office door I could see the blueprints lying where I had left them but by the time I had reached the desk….." Here Dr Shelby halted and looked at Colonel Richmond.

"Go on, Walter, don't worry about talking in front of Mr West and Mr Gordon. They are very open minded gentlemen," he urged.

"Yes, please carry on, Dr Shelby," Jim said. "We have come across many weird things on our missions for the Government. I'm sure your story can't be that strange."

Artie nodded in agreement.

Shelby swallowed and continued. "I suddenly I realised the desk was empty – there were no plans, nothing."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	2. Chapter 2

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 2

" **That's how I remember it"**

 _Still in Colonel Richmond's office_

Artie and Jim looked at each other with puzzled expressions.

"And before you ask," Shelby continued, "I checked in the desk drawers and on the floor. I even looked in the safe. The blueprints were not in the room."

Jim turned to Richmond. "Is there anything physically wrong with Dr Shelby?" he asked.

"Hey, you can ask me," Shelby said, irritated. "There is nothing wrong with me."

"I apologise, Dr Shelby," Jim said.

"I had a couple of doctors look Dr Shelby over, just in case," Richmond said. "They gave him a clean bill of health."

"A couple of doctors?" Artie queried.

"Yes, one of them was a specialist in mental health," Richmond explained. "He didn't find anything that could have caused a mental block, blackout or loss of memory."

"This certainly is a mystery," Artie said. "Are you sure you locked your office door before you stepped outside?"

"Yes, I already told you. I always keep the door locked when I'm not there, especially since I had left the blueprint out. And, as I also told you, I could see the blueprint sitting on my desk when I entered the room."

Artie shrugged. "Just making sure," he said.

Jim stood up and approached the Colonel and spoke quietly into his ear. "Could I have a word with you without the Doctor?" he said.

Richmond nodded and turned to Dr Shelby. "Thank you, Dr Shelby," he said, "you can take the rest of the day off."

"Thank you, Colonel," Shelby said. "I'll be in tomorrow and start on a new set of blueprints unless of course….."

"Yes Dr Shelby?"

"Well now that someone else has the plans the gun will be obsolete. I'll need to make improvements."

"I guess that's true. Why don't you go home and think about it?"

"Yes…yes I will." He nodded to the two agents and left the room.

"What is it, Jim?" Richmond asked, once he was gone.

"Colonel, how many people knew about the gun?"

"Let's see, there were Shelby and myself and the President of course. You think Shelby told someone about his work?"

"Putting aside the odd way the blueprints disappeared, someone had to have known of their existence in order to be able to steal them. Are we sure Dr Shelby isn't making the whole thing up?"

"Jim, I've known Shelby for many years, he's a brilliant man and it just doesn't make sense that he would steal his own invention let alone try to cover his tracks with such a bizarre story and one that draws attention to him and precludes the possibility of anyone else being involved. I just don't buy it."

Jim nodded. "I see your point," he said.

Richmond ran a hand through his hair. "I'm totally baffled by all this and I'd be interested to know how you are going to proceed."

The two agents looked at each other. Where to begin? "I'd like to take a look at Dr Shelby's office," Jim finally said.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Dr Shelby's Office_

"Well, we've made a thorough search and we've turned up nothing," Artie said, planting his backside on Shelby's desk and crossing his legs in front of him, hands in pockets.

Jim was hopelessly thumbing through some papers he had had already examined at least twice. He threw them down on the desk and walked over to the door, testing the lock by turning the key back and forth. "Dr Shelby said the door was locked didn't he?"

"That's how I remember it," Artie replied.

"Before and after the theft?"

"Before and after." Artie stood up and walked over to his partner. When he spoke there was interest in his voice. "What are you thinking?" he asked.

"I just wondered, what if the thief didn't break in but followed Shelby into the room, before he could lock the door. But in that case he couldn't…."

"…..leave again without Shelby seeing him," Artie supplied, deflated. "But even if the thief did manage to leave without the Doctor seeing him, that doesn't explain how he took the blueprints right from under the Doctor's nose," he added. "We just can't get past that impossible fact."

"You're wrong, Artie, it can't be impossible because it happened."

Artie shook his head. "Until someone shows me how it was done, in my book, it's impossible."

"Have it your own way," Jim said. "I think we've wasted enough time here. I'm going to report back to Colonel Richmond."

"What do you want me to do?"

"I think one of us should keep an eye on Dr Shelby. See if he meets up with anyone suspicious."

"I get all the glamorous jobs," Artie said. "I suppose that you are going off to meet with a beautiful female, as usual, once you've finished with Colonel Richmond that is."

"Well, if the opportunity arises I shall be happy to do just that," Jim said. "But something tells me this case isn't going to turn out the same way most of our missions do."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Colonel Richmond's Office – Once Again_

"So the blueprints were definitely not in Shelby's office," Richmond confirmed, having received Jim's verbal report.

"No, Sir, and we didn't find anything suspicious or anything that would explain their loss. Artie has gone to Dr Shelby's house. He'll keep an eye on his comings and goings and any contacts he makes. I don't hold out much hope of us finding anything fishy about him, though, for the reasons that you gave earlier."

"I know it's the standard procedure in a case like this but is that really the best we can do?"

"I'm afraid so, Sir. We won't know for a couple of days whether Shelby's connected to this in some way. If he is then he'll probably make a move by then. If we could only work out how the theft was carried out then we would have a far better chance of finding out who did it."

"Despite my faith in Shelby's integrity, I have to take into account that what he described is absolutely impossible. Perhaps we should hold him in custody just to be on the safe side."

"You're hoping that he hasn't already handed the plans over and that we can prevent him from doing so?" Jim queried.

"Yes."

"In that case, it's better to leave him where he is. At least that way we'll find out who he passes the plans to, if he hasn't already done so."

Richmond sighed. "Of course you're right," he said. "It's only that I hate the idea of just waiting here, doing nothing."

Jim nodded. "I feel the same," he said. "We need to get those plans back as soon as possible. I have an idea. As this crime seems to have been done by magic, maybe I should visit a magician I know. They may be able to tell me how it was done."

"Good thinking. You'd better go and find him straight away."

Jim nodded, put his hat on, and left the room.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Yew Tree House, Washington DC_

Jim didn't waste any time in looking up his old friend, one of the best magicians in town who was, he discovered appearing at a gathering of magic practitioners in a house owned by a local man of good family. The lights were on and walking to the door, Jim rang the bell and showed the butler his credentials and mentioned his friend's name when the man seemed hesitant to admit him. Eventually he was allowed into the house but made to wait until the current performer had finished their exhibition. The magician in question happened to be his friend who came as soon as the performance was over having received the message that Jim was there.

"Well, James darling this is a surprise!"

Jim had neglected to tell Colonel Richmond that his magician friend was a woman, a young beautiful one. She was about five feet five inches with blonde hair, green eyes and a charming smile.

"Hello Della," Jim replied, leaning into her arms for the delicious kiss she placed on his lips.

Greetings over she took his hand and walked him to a nearby door, which he opened for her, and led her into what turned out to be a small sitting room. She sat down in one of the armchairs, carefully arranging her glittering evening dress around her. She saw Jim looking at it.

"One always has to dress up for these select gatherings," she explained. "It's expected. Now why have you suddenly decided to look me up after all this time?"

"Has it really been that long?" Jim asked, sitting on the sofa opposite her.

Della was too used to Jim's way of life to believe that he had missed her company even a little bit over the more than six months since she had last seen him, but she gave him credit for being a friend she could rely on if she needed one so she didn't tease him. "Let's cut to the chase," she said. "What do you want from me?"

"I'm in need of a magician, or should I say a magician's advice," he said.

"Why come to me?"

"Because I know you and I also know that you won't mention anything I tell you to anyone outside of these four walls," Jim said.

"Top secret, huh?"

"Very."

"How can I help?"

"Do you know of any trick by which someone could remove an item from a table right under a person's nose without them noticing?"

"Is this something that you want to be able to do? Do you want me to show you how?"

"No to the first question and yes to the second one," Jim said.

"Well you could do it by sleight of hand, and by directing the person's attention away from what you're doing," she said.

"Would the person be able to see you?"

"Yes of course."

"Then that's no good. What if the perpetrator was on the ceiling," he asked, having only just thought of that possibility. "I could kick myself for not having thought of that before. Well?"

"Then you would see the object rise into the air," Della pointed out.

Jim sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "So you can't explain how it was done?" he asked.

"You mean it actually happened?"

"Yes."

"My goodness!"

"Exactly." Jim stood up and held out his hand. "I'm sorry I wasted your time; it was good to see you again. Let me escort you back to the gathering."

Della took stood up, straightened her skirts and took his hand. "I'm sorry I couldn't help you, Jim. Good luck finding out what happened."

"Thank you. It looks like I'm going to need a lot of luck…or just maybe….."

"What is it? Have you come up with something?"

"Yes and I have to go and find Artie. Goodnight, Della."

Jim dropped her hand and left the room in a hurry.

"So much for my escort," Della said. "I wonder how long before I see him again." She shook her head and made her way back to the ballroom to watch the rest of the magic show.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	3. Chapter 3

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 3

" **What's in California?"**

 _Back on the Wanderer_

"I'm really glad you took me off that detail," Artie was saying. "I was bored, cold and hungry, a deadly combination." He had removed his coat and was reaching for the whiskey decanter. "Shelby didn't stir from his house all night." He poured himself a glass and threw the fiery liquid down his throat. "Aaah, I needed that."

"Don't overdo it," Jim warned. "You only have an hour or two to catch up on lost sleep."

"Where are we headed?"

"Only as far as California. We're leaving as soon as Orin has the train ready."

"California? Did you pick up a lead then?"

"No, it's just an idea I've had."

Artie sat down. "An idea you say. Are you going to tell me about it?"

"Of course; I thought we might pay a visit to our alter egos."

"Do you mean us from the alternate reality?" Artie asked, amazed. "What on earth for?"

"Well last time we ran into them you found out that we'd had parallel experiences, even though there were some differences. I thought they just might have come across a similar crime and found the person we're looking for."

"I hate to say this, Jim, but that is bordering on sheer genius. Mind you, any idea that meant I didn't have to sit outside Shelby's house all night in the freezing cold would border on genius."

"Thank you, I'm glad I could oblige."

"But hold on a minute, there's a problem. Whenever one of us travels to the other reality our counterpart appears here so if we both go we won't find either of us…them…there."

"I know, I've decided that you should be the one to go, if you're willing."

"I don't usually get a choice," Artie pointed out.

"I know you've passed between realities before but that doesn't mean it isn't dangerous. It would be unfair of me to order you to take the risk."

Artie's expression softened at this evidence of his partner's consideration. "Hell, you know I'll go and gladly if it will solve the riddle we've been confronted with," he said.

Jim smiled with relief. "I knew I could count on you," he said, standing to pat Artie on the shoulder. "But I'm glad you said yes because I'm relying on your scientific expertise which I think we're going to need; we're already on our way to California."

"What's in California?" Artie asked, then he answered his own question. "President Loveless!" he said.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _California – The President's Residence_

It was early morning when the Wanderer arrived in the capital of California. They left the Wanderer as soon as it pulled into the train station and went to visit the President at a most unsocial hour. However, they had sent word by telegraph before they started their journey so they hoped the President would be up and ready to greet them.

"Hello, gentlemen, this is a wonderful surprise." President Loveless held out his hand in greeting as he rose from his armchair situated in the sitting room of the Presidential wing of the Government building.

Jim and Artie moved forward and each shook his hand in turn. "It's good to see you too, Mr President," Jim said. "It was kind of you to receive us on such short notice and so early in the day."

"Think nothing of it," Loveless replied, sitting down and motioning his visitors to be seated as well. His own chair was of a size appropriate to his stature but the rest of the furniture was of regular proportions. "Now what brings you to California, apart from our beautiful scenery, that is?"

"We wondered if you could help us with a scientific matter," Artie said.

Loveless's face lit up. "I would be only too pleased. That is my area of expertise. Before I became President, my life was devoted to the world of invention and scientific discovery. I have doctorates in Physics and Engineering you know. Alas, nowadays I am a mere dabbler in the scientific realm."

"Everyone knows of your reputation, Sir, and what a genius you are in that area."

Loveless smiled a deprecating smile but it was obvious he was pleased. "You pay me too great a compliment, Mr Gordon, though I must say that my dedication to the government of this beautiful country of California has been considered by some as a great loss to the scientific community."

"That's why we thought of you immediately," Jim chimed in, "as just the person to help us out." He paused. "When we last met it was over the matter of the clocks that moved Artie between realities. I believe that you still have one of those clocks."

"Yes, I do," Loveless confirmed. "I had meant to give it to you both as a reminder of your adventure but I'm afraid I changed my mind. I decided it was far too interesting a challenge to my scientific knowledge and that I needed to know more about the element within it. In fact I have been working on the matter ever since, in whatever time I could spare."

A look of excitement showed on Artie's face. "Have you discovered anything more about it?" he asked.

"Yes," Loveless replied, "I have but why is it of interest to you two? Are you intending to travel between realities again?"

"We are," Jim said. "We have come across an impossible crime carried out by a remarkable criminal and our best chance of finding him is to discover if our counterparts have already come across him and how they solved the crime."

Loveless beamed. "I have stumbled upon something that will interest you, gentlemen. Come with me to my laboratory and I will reveal it to you."

He stood up and gestured to them to follow him. He drew back a curtain that was hanging against the wall on the other side of the room and revealed a hidden door. He took a key from his pocket and turned it in the lock. The door opened and he ushered his guests inside.

"I like to keep my research secret," Loveless explained. He pointed to a table in the corner where there was a strange piece of apparatus that was only vaguely familiar to Artie. "That is where I am synthesising a substance that will make cotton obsolete. Man need never fear the boll weevil again," he announced.

"Very interesting," Artie said, moving toward the table. Loveless stopped him with a gesture. "The thing you're interested in is over here," he said, walking toward a bench on which the clock they remembered was sitting. It was only the casing though, the substance it had once held was missing. Artie spotted a glass retort holding a flask containing greenish liquid.

"What's that?" he asked pointing and walking toward it.

Loveless hurried after him. "That is a mixture of a distillation of some of the element and another substance. I have been able to place the original substance in the periodic table between two other elements. I have named it Lovelessium. I know my evil counterpart named it Miguelitum but I see no reason to honour his choice in any way as he sought to use it to carry out a murder. I have named the mixture of the two liquids Presidentium. A small amount of the liquid in this bottle should allow you to not only pass into the alternative reality but enable you to meet your counterparts, rather than switching places with them. However, I have not tested it yet. It is still just a theory."

Jim frowned. "Has it the potential to kill Artie if it fails?" he asked.

Loveless shrugged. "No, no, no it will either work in the same way that it did before or not at all, but I can't see it being dangerous."

Jim nodded, slightly relieved.

"Although the mechanism is a little different from before in that it will need to be injected intravenously," the resident continued.

"What is the substance you have mixed with it?" Artie asked, his scientific curiosity to the fore.

"That must remain a secret. It's not that I don't trust you, gentlemen, but I can't afford to trust anyone. If it works it could cause mayhem. As long as there was an exchange of people, equilibrium was maintained between the two realities. It shouldn't matter if a couple of people find their way through to the other reality without anyone coming through in their place but we have to be careful not to put the different worlds too much out of balance by allowing a larger number than that to travel through at will."

"I can understand your caution," Jim said.

Artie nodded. "The question is, are you willing to let us have some of the new substance?"

Loveless nodded. "I will for two reasons," he said, "firstly, because it will give me a chance to test its effectiveness; secondly, because I want to help you solve the crime you mentioned. But now, you must join me for breakfast, during which you can tell me the details of the crime that has the best secret agents in the US puzzled. Then, when you have eaten I will send Mr Gordon on his way. These things can't be rushed you know."

The two agents nodded and followed Loveless from the laboratory.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

During breakfast, the two agents told the President the whole story of the stolen blueprints and he was just as astounded as they were.

"I am as anxious as you that you get to the bottom of this," he said, "not least because my position relies a lot on the relationship I hold with your Government and I would not like to see it in trouble or undermined. But you must excuse me. I have some adjustments to make before I am ready to employ my new substance. It shouldn't take me long. Please have another cup of coffee. I will come and get you when I am ready."

"Thank you," Jim said, "this coffee is excellent by the way."

"Thank you for taking the trouble to help us," Artie said.

"Think nothing of it," Loveless said. "A visit from friends is always welcome and it is I who should be thanking you for helping me to test my new substance."

With that Loveless left the room and returned twenty minutes or so later, enough time for Jim and Artie to enjoy several more cups of the delicious coffee.

"Everything is ready for you, gentlemen," Loveless said.

The two agents stood up and Jim motioned for Artie to go ahead of him. Once they were back in the laboratory they noticed that there was now a cot with a sheet and a pillow in the middle of the laboratory. Artie walked over to it, realising that he would have to be asleep for the transfer to take place, as he had done in the past. He lay down on the cot.

"I'm not sure I can fall asleep just like that," he said.

Loveless chuckled. "There will be no need," he said. "The substance should work as soon as it enters your blood. Administering it while you are lying down is just a precaution, in case you lose consciousness."

Artie looked a little alarmed at that but lay down on the cot anyway.

Loveless turned to Jim.

"Do you have any last words to say to Mr Gordon before he departs?" he asked.

"Yes," Jim said. "If our counterparts in the other reality have come up against the person we're looking for then come back as soon as you find out the name. If you draw a blank then come back anyway and we'll have to think of something else."

"I understand," Artie said. "Time is of the essence."

"Hopefully this is good-bye," Loveless said as he placed the needle of the syringe against Artie's arm and pressed the plunger.

The two men watched as Artie's eyes slowly closed. In just a matter of seconds he began to dematerialise and they watched him disappear until there was nothing left of him.

"Come back safe, Artie!" Jim said as he and Loveless left the laboratory. His partner was gone but he had no way of knowing where he was. He just hoped his friend would be all right.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	4. Chapter 4

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 4

" **I keep it in a box in a cupboard"**

 _Back on the Wanderer_

Artie arrived to hear a voice he was familiar with asking him "Who are you? And more to the point, how did you get here?"

'Here' was the galley on the Wanderer, now occupied by twin Arties. "It worked," Artie said.

"What the….. you're me," came the reply.

"Who are you talking to?" a voice asked from the doorway. "Artie?" Jim questioned, wondering which of the two he should be addressing.

"Hi Jim," Artie said. "It's me, remember? We met before. The clock?" he prompted.

"You're from the alternate reality," Jim realised. "But this time my Artie stayed here."

"Yes, President Loveless refined the process. I was the first to try it out – and it worked!"

Artie looked at his doppelganger and shook his head in disbelief. "Jim told me there was another me," he said, "but it's a whole different matter when you meet up with yourself."

"Artie," Jim said, and two faces turned to him. "Yes," they said.

Jim scratched his head. "Well, it's obvious I can't call you both Artie. I know, I'll call my version Artie and you from the alternate reality will be Artemus – all right?"

Both men nodded. "Fine," they said.

"Okay, Artemus, Artie was fixing coffee when you arrived. Maybe we should sit down and have a cup and you can tell us why you're here."

Artemus nodded. "That sounds fine. But I have to tell you, I don't have a lot of time."

"Understood. Artie, Artemus and I will go and sit down. Please bring the coffee in when it's ready."

"Sure thing, Jim. Won't be a moment."

"Thank you. I guess you know your way around the Wanderer. Let's go and make ourselves comfortable."

Artemus went ahead of Jim into the varnish car. They had only been there long enough for Jim to enquire after the well-being of his counterpart back in the other reality, whom he had never met but felt he had a connection with, when Artie entered with the coffee."

Artemus thanked him as he took the cup of hot liquid that Artie poured for him.

"We've both had breakfast," Artie said, "but if you'd like me to whip something up for you, I could do it in a moment."

"No need," Artemus said, taking a sip of the coffee. "Ah just how I like it. We had breakfast with President Loveless."

"I'll never get used to there being another Loveless, one who is not always trying to kill the James West in your reality," Jim said.

"And I find it hard to believe that such a talented genius could be so evil," Artemus countered.

"Interesting though that is, I'm sure you didn't come here just to make me almost drop a pot of coffee on my foot," Artie said.

"No," Artemus agreed. "Although it is good to see you again, Jim, and to meet you, Artie, I wouldn't be here if we weren't in trouble in our reality and you could be our only hope to sort things out."

"How do you figure that?" Artie asked.

"Well I hope you have come up against the same thing in your reality as we have in ours and you could tell us the solution."

"You'd better explain it all then," Jim said.

Artemus took a deep breath and proceeded to explain exactly what had happened and, when he had finished his story, he noticed Jim and Artie exchange a look.

"You've come across this before, haven't you?" Artemus guessed.

Jim was the one to speak. "We have come up against a man who could do exactly what you described and we know how it was done. The man's name was Morgan Midas."*

"Why do you say 'was'?"

"Because he died before we could take him into custody."

"And he tried to take Jim with him!" Artie added. "He would have killed him if he could."

"Still, if you tell me everything you know about him I should be able to locate him in my reality and get back the blueprints."

"That's where our case differs from yours," Jim said. "Our Midas never stole any blueprints."

"But we have seen differences in our cases before," Artemus pointed out. "Look at the discrepancy between your Miguelito Loveless and mine and my Jim had to wear glasses to read small print, after his run-in with Captain Coffin.** He told me how surprised Artie was to see them so I'm guessing you came through that assignment unscathed, Jim."

"Yes, thank goodness," Jim said. "And you're right; it must be the same man. There is no other explanation. And it does fit with his ultimate goal, which was to be the most powerful man in the world."

"But even if it's not the same man you could at least tell me how he did it," Artemus said, his curiosity threatening to overwhelm him.

"With diamonds, that's how he did it," Artie said.

"What do you mean?"

"He would melt down the diamonds and use them as the main ingredient in an elixir which, when he drank it, speeded up his metabolism so that he could move thousands of times faster than ordinary humans. The people around him seemed as if they were standing still. I once saw him break into a glass case at the International Jewel Exhibition, which was protected by a foolproof burglar alarm, remove the jewel and leave the building before the alarm was triggered. No one else saw a thing. It was as if he was invisible to them. I built that burglar alarm myself and it was pretty galling to have to watch him outwit it so easily."

"How could you have seen him if he was moving as fast as you say?"

"Because he made us both drink a little of the elixir," Jim said, "just enough so that we could witness his genius at work but not sufficient for us to be able to apprehend him afterwards. He got clean away."

"This is incredible. He's looking more and more like the man I'm after. I just need to know where he lives – sorry – I forgot he's dead. Can you tell me where he lived? Hopefully he'll be in the same place in my reality and we can pick him up."

"Our Mr Midas's laboratory was in his aunt's house, Lady Margaret Midas," Jim told him. "I wish you luck in finding him."

"Thanks for the coffee," Artemus said, standing up. "I hate to love and leave you but I have to get back as soon as possible and tell Jim the news. I'm going to need your clock, by the way."

"You took a great risk in coming here if you were relying on us having the clock to send you back," Artie said.

"Why, you haven't lost it have you?" Artemus asked, not willing to admit that neither Jim nor he had considered how he would return from his assignment.

"No, I keep it in a box in a cupboard in my laboratory," Artie said.

"Then there's no problem," Artemus said. "Let's go and get it."

Artie shrugged and stood up, ready to lead the way, then remembered that Artemus knew exactly where the laboratory was so he held back and let Artemus lead the way with Jim going next.

"What made you decide to keep it in the laboratory?" Artemus asked.

"It's the place I'm least likely to fall asleep and accidentally activate it," Artie explained.

"On the other hand I'm in danger of falling asleep in there if I ever let Artie explain the details of one of his chemical experiments," Jim jibed.

"Very funny," Artie said. "It's in that cupboard over there. Here you are," he added, taking a bunch of keys from a hook on the wall and tossing them to his counterpart.

Artemus caught the keys and, as they were the same as his own, knew which one to use to open the door to the cupboard in question. "Is it in this box?" he asked, lifting out a metal container.

"Yes that's it."

Artemus put the box on the work bench and then unfastened the latch and opened it. He looked inside.

"Are you sure this is where you keep the clock?" he said.

"Why?" Jim asked.

"Because there's nothing in here," Artemus announced, showing them the inside of the box as proof.

Artie grabbed the box from him and peered at it, turning it over and over in his hands, as if he couldn't believe his eyes.

"Jim, it's gone!" he said. Then he turned to Artemus. "You're trapped here."

Ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued

*The Night of the Burning Diamond

**The Night of a Thousand Eyes


	5. Chapter 5

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 5

" **He Wears an Eyepatch"**

 _The Wanderer, several minutes later_

The three men were once more seated in the varnish car. Artemus was ashen-faced. There was no way to return to his own reality and no way to contact his James West to let him know what had happened.

"If I don't get back soon Jim might think I died while travelling here," he said.

Jim put a hand on his shoulder. "If your Jim is anything like me, he won't give up that easily."

"We have to find the clock," Artie said. "But first we need to know who could have taken it."

"More important than that is how it was taken," Jim said. "We have a foolproof security system on the Wanderer. No one could have gotten in here and stolen it and, if they did, they would have no way of getting out again."

Artemus's ears pricked up. "I seem to remember hearing the word 'foolproof once before," he said, "when Artie was talking about the alarm on the case containing the jewel."

"Midas?" Artie said. "But it couldn't have been him. He's dead."

"Well, if it wasn't him then it was someone who has the ability to do exactly the same as he could. He obviously avoided your alarm system by stealing the clock while you were both on board but without you seeing him. It's obvious to me," Artemus said. He clicked his fingers as he realised something else. "I've just realised something else. Whoever it was must have used the clock to travel to my reality and it was he who stole the blueprints. It all makes sense."

"But how did this person know about the clock and what it can do?" Jim asked.

"Hmm, that's a little harder to explain," Artemus said.

"And how did he find out about Midas and his discovery?" Artie chipped in.

Artemus put his head in his hands. "This just gets more and more confusing," he said.

"Well, at least we know one thing," Artie said.

"What's that?"

"We have to get the clock back so that you can go home."

"Fine," Jim said. "Then we should head for Washington DC."

"Why?"

"Because that's where Artie's reports on all of our past assignments are filed."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Colonel Richmond's Office, Washington DC_

"It's just incredible!" Colonel Richmond said, looking from one Artie to the other. "It's absolutely incredible!"

"Yes Colonel, we know," Jim said. "But we need your help and we need to move quickly or there could be a real problem in Artemus's reality."

"Ah yes, you've decided to call Artie's counterpart Artemus. That should avoid any confusion. Now which one of you is Artemus?"

"I am, Sir," Artemus replied.

"Right, now what can I do to help?"

Artie stepped in to answer for his counterpart. "We believe that the criminal we're looking for has accessed the archives to get details of two of our past missions; the affair of Morgan Midas and our contact with the alternative reality."

"But that is top secret information. Access to that is limited to very few people," Richmond said.

"We're aware of that, Sir, but we need to see a list of people who have looked at those particular reports."

"Yes, yes, of course." Richmond leaned across his desk and pressed a button on his intercom. His secretary's voice said, "Yes, sir."

"Miss Drake, I'd like a list of all the people who have visited the top secret archive within the last six months."

"Yes, Sir."

"As soon as possible," Richmond added.

"Right away, Sir, the voice said.

"Thank you."

Richmond turned back to the three men in front of him. "That should cover the period since the first of the two reports was filed," he said.

"Thank you, Sir," Artemus said.

"I've read Mr Gordon's report on his experiences in the alternative reality," Richmond said to Artemus, "but I'd be interested in hearing more, while we wait for Miss Drake to bring us the information we need.

"Certainly Colonel," Artemus replied. "The first thing I have to tell you is that my Colonel Richmond wears and eye-patch to cover an injury he received during an encounter with a group of rebel soldiers during the war."

"Well I never," Richmond replied. "I very nearly did lose an eye during just such a skirmish. As it was I turned my head at the last moment and the bullet grazed the side of my face. It would seem my counterpart was not so lucky."

"Quite so, Sir. It didn't stop him continuing his career in the army, though, and very successfully."

"I wouldn't mind meeting your Colonel, to find out any more differences or indeed similarities between the two of us."

"I'm sure he'd be delighted, Sir," Artmeus said.

There was a knock at the door and a woman opened it and walked over to Colonel Richmond, giving a slight nod of acknowledgement to the other men in the room before placing a piece of paper on his desk. She wasn't surprised at there being two Artemus Gordons as she had been introduced to Artie's counterpart when they had first arrived. She was a willowy brunette with a natural smile that attracted people to her, along with a way of walking that drew the attention of males wherever she went. James West had long been an admirer of hers, though only from a distance. He didn't think Richmond would approve of him getting involved with his secretary. It would amount to insubordination in his eyes.

"That's a complete list, Colonel," she said.

"Thank you, Miss Drake; that will be all."

The secretary left the room, sending a smile the way of the three other men, on her way out.

Artemus, whose own Colonel Richmond employed a male secretary, cleared his throat. "What are the names on the list, Sir?"

Richmond took only a second to scan the writing on the piece of paper. "There are only five," he said, "all with top secret clearance. Perhaps Artemus will make something of it."

He handed the list to Artemus, who looked at it closely. "This is interesting," he said, "Dr Walter Shelby is the only person to have asked to see both reports." He frowned. "That's a bit of a coincidence."

"Not really," Richmond said. "He takes a look at all reports that include an element of new scientific knowledge."

"Hmm," Artemus said. "That fits with my own Dr Shelby. Anyway, why would he want to steal the blueprints of a gun produced by his own counterpart? He is just as capable of drawing them up himself."

"Is there any way someone could access the reports without their name appearing on the list?" Jim asked.

"No, the key to the archive is locked away and can only be retrieved from Miss Drake by signing a book on her desk."

"Perhaps we should speak to Dr Shelby anyway," Jim said. "Perhaps he showed the reports to someone."

"It's worth a try," Artie said.

"Well then, gentlemen, I will leave you to your investigations. Please keep me informed of any developments," Richmond said.

The three agents took that as a hint to leave the Colonel's office and made their way toward the door.

"Would you mind staying behind please, Jim?" Richmond said. "Much as I am willing to help our friends in the other reality I can't spare both of my best agents. I need you to finalise the security arrangements for the President's reception tomorrow evening."

Jim nodded and turned back with a wave to his fellow agents.

"We'd better go and find Dr Shelby," Artie said as he and Artemus left the room.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	6. Chapter 6

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 6

" **I never knew I was so stubborn until I met you"**

 _Outside the Office of Doctor Walter Shelby_

"Maybe you should let me ask the questions," Artie suggested.

"I don't see why," Artemus said.

"Well, after all he is from my reality."

"I don't see what difference that makes. I'm the one who needs the answers," Artemus pointed out.

"I'm perfectly capable of asking the necessary questions," Artie said.

"Maybe you should stay outside. It might freak him out seeing two of us."

"This is silly," Artie said, smiling suddenly. "We're the same person so we should be able to agree."

Artemus gave him a wry look. "Yeah, I never realised I was so stubborn until I met you," he said.

Artie gave him a mock glare. "Anyway, it's easily solved; we'll both go in and…."

At that moment the door to Shelby's office opened and the man himself appeared. "I'm sick of listening to all this noise," he said. "Either come inside or….er…."

"Yes there are two of us," Artie said, walking past the astonished scientist and entering the office ahead of his doppelganger.

Shelby scuttled back into his office and Artemus brought up the rear, shutting the door behind him.

Artie perched on Shelby's desk and looked around him. Artemus walked over to a drawing board to take a look at what the Doctor was working on.

"Hey, that's top secret," Shelby said, pulling Artemus away. He sat at his desk and looked up at his identical visitors.

"Now, perhaps you would like to explain what you want and why there are two of you," he said.

"You don't seem particularly surprised about that," Artie said, commenting on his second question.

"I am a government scientist, Mr Gordon, and it has been my duty to study all of your reports over the years. I am sure I have come across several wherein you mentioned copies of either yourself or Mr West being made by one mad man or another. I'm merely curious as to why the two of you appear to be working together."

Artemus moved closer to the desk and placed his hands palms down on it. "Well then, you might remember a report involving a substance by which a man can pass into an alternative reality," he said.

"Amazing," Shelby said, taking a closer look at the man in front of him. "Are you the Artemus Gordon from that alternate reality? If so then I am truly astonished, as I had understood from our Mr Gordon's report that when one version entered the alternate reality its opposite moved to the vacant place left behind so that no two versions would ever meet. And yet you seem to have achieved that very outcome. I should be very interested in the mechanism by which you have done this and also why it was necessary. Which brings me back to my original question – What are you doing here?"

"That information is, I'm afraid, top secret," Artie butted in.

"Never mind, I shall read about it in your next report," Shelby said.

Artie had no answer to that.

"We've come to talk to you about those reports you have read so diligently," Artemus said, "two in particular, in fact."

"Which would those be?" Shelby asked.

"Well obviously the one concerning the alternative reality, otherwise I wouldn't be here. The other involved the late Morgan Midas."

"You'll have to remind me about that one," Shelby said.

Artie frowned. "Surely you couldn't possibly forget a man who could travel faster than the speed of light."

Shelby swallowed. "Oh yes, I recall it now. Something to do with diamonds, wasn't it?"

"Something to do with diamonds?" Artie almost spluttered. "As a scientist weren't you fascinated by the fact that a man could dissolve diamonds and use the resultant liquid to such astonishing effect?"

"It was interesting of course. But why come to talk to me about this now?"

"Because we suspect that someone has visited the alternate reality and used the diamond potion to carry out a theft," Artemus took over the conversation.

"Why should you think I know anything about it?"

"You, Dr Shelby, are the only person to have borrowed both of those reports from the archive. That puts you in a very suspicious position."

"Are you suggesting that I am a criminal of some kind?" Shelby said, outraged. "It would take even such a talented scientist as me many months to perfect the methods needed to do what you have outlined. Where would I have found the time when I have been working hard on plans for the Government?"

Artemus scratched his head. Shelby made a good point.

"Why I don't even have the necessary equipment to do what you suggest," Shelby added, to drive the point home.

"As a matter of interest, what have you been working on?" Artie asked.

"As I told you before, that is top secret," Shelby replied.

"Is this it?" Artemus queried, striding to the drawing board and tearing the papers pinned to it from their mooring.

"Don't!" Shelby said.

"These are the blue prints for a large gun," Artemus said, looking at his counterpart; "Perhaps the exact gun that my own Dr Shelby has developed."

"Well that's not unusual," Shelby said, walking over to Artemus and grabbing the blue prints from his hand. "He and I are essentially the same man. Why shouldn't we think entirely alike?"

"I don't know," Artemus said with a shrug, "but it's strange that nothing else has been exactly the same in both realities."

Artie moved toward the Doctor. "Dr Shelby, I think we should all go and visit Colonel Richmond and see what he has to say about this."

With a look of panic on his face, Walter Shelby produced a vial from his pocket, removed the top, which he threw to the floor, tipped it up and swallowed the contents with one gulp.

Before either of his visitors could make a move Shelby was able to walk out of his office, leaving Artie and his counterpart standing as if turned to stone.

"Quick, we have to get after him!" Artemus said once they realised Dr Shelby was gone.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Dr Walter Shelby's Residence a short while later_

Artemus assumed that Shelby would live in the same place that he did in the other dimension. So he was able to lead Artie to his address. Artie looked through the front window while Artemus peered over his shoulder and then went to try the front door. Once he realised it was unlocked, he motioned to his partner who went to join him as he pushed the door slowly open. They entered cautiously, guns drawn, but as they went from room to room it became obvious that there was no-one home. In one of the upstairs rooms Artie found something of interest.

"Hey, take a look at this!" he said.

Artemus joined Artie, who was looking at the contents of a small table next to Shelby's bed. It was a small vial of green liquid and a syringe.

"Looks like he did find a way to travel to the alternate reality," Artemus said. "This liquid looks identical to the stuff that President Loveless injected me with."

"And moving at the speed he was when we last saw him, he's had plenty of time to get here before us and inject himself. Goodness knows what havoc he could be causing in your reality."

"At this point," Artemus said, "We can be pretty sure it involves diamonds."

He picked up the syringe and looked at Artie.

"Are you game?" he asked.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	7. Chapter 7

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 7

" **Thanks to Doguelito"**

 _Laboratory, the President's House, California_

Artie and Artemus reappeared in Loveless' laboratory and ventured out into the President's sitting room. He was not there but came out of his office shortly after with his small dog in tow. It greeted Artemus happily but growled at Artie.

"Ah, I know which Mr Gordon is mine thanks to Doguelito," Loveless said, bringing the dog to him. "No you mustn't bark at the nice man, naughty boy!"

"Doguelito?" Artie queried.

"Yes a present from Mr Gordon and Mr West," Loveless explained. "I suppose that would be out of the question in your reality."

"Oh we'd be happy to send our Doctor Loveless a dog but only if it would bite him or explode or something."

Loveless laughed then looked at Artemus. "But I'm confused. Was it part of your plan to bring your alternate back with you?"

"I'm sorry to take advantage of your hospitality like this," Artemus said, "but things have become a little complicated. First their clock was stolen so I couldn't get back here, then while looking for the culprit we ran up against the person who was responsible for our problem at this end. He seems to have come up with a formula similar to yours, meaning he can travel back and forth between dimensions without a transfer taking place with his alternate."

"Hmm, he must be a man of great intellect," Loveless said.

Artie was amused to find that this Loveless was every bit as arrogant as theirs.

"Yes," Artemus replied, "he is a top scientist working for the Government. That reminds me, I must get a message to Colonel Richmond. Where is James by the way?"

"He is on the floor below with my administrative staff. He was worried you had been trapped between dimensions."

"Damn, I'd better go and find him."

"I'll come with you," Artie said. "I'm dying to meet a different version of my partner. And he'll probably get a kick out of seeing both of us together."

"Please excuse us Mr President," Artemus said. "I hope you won't mind if we come back to use your facilities again later."

"You're welcome of course. I would give you your own supply of Presidentium but, under the present circumstances I don't think I should let it out of my sight."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Administrative Offices of the Californian Government_

Jim was surprised to see Artie and Artemus and he had some difficulty telling them apart.

"Artie?" he asked tentatively looking at the wrong one."

"You'll have to address me as Artemus for now, Jim," the other one said. "That's how your counterpart decided to tell us apart and if we change it now it will be way too confusing. You know Loveless' dog could tell us apart. You are officially less discerning than a small dog."

Jim gave him a sarcastic smile. "Very funny; now would you like to explain why you are so late and also why you have brought Artie back with you?"

Artemus told him the whole story.

"So now we have two Doctor Shelbys to deal with. Well you returned just in time to stop me from sending a message to Washington DC reporting your disappearance."

"Thank goodness, now we just have to find out where the criminal version of Shelby is."

"Let's think about this for a moment," Artie said. "From what we have experienced, when travelling to another dimension, you end up where your alternate is. That's what Artemus did. But when we returned we ended up at his starting point."

"So you're saying that your Shelby should arrive in this dimension in the place where our Shelby is," Jim clarified.

"Yes."

"Wouldn't our Shelby notice him?" Artemus asked.

"I suspect that he travels under the influence of the diamond elixir. Your Shelby would be unaware of his presence."

Jim and Artemus exchanged looks. Jim voiced what they were thinking. "So he could be absolutely anywhere by now."

"Sadly, yes. We have our work cut out for us."

"What about finding out where he is getting his diamonds from," Artemus suggested.

"Good idea," Artie agreed. "We could contact your Colonel Richmond and ask him if there have been reports of any substantial diamond thefts."

Jim and Artemus looked at him strangely.

"What is it?" Artie asked.

"Just wondering why anyone would steal something that's so easy to get hold of," Jim told him.

"Easy to get hold of? Diamonds are easy to get hold of?" he repeated, thinking that he must have misunderstood.

"Yes, you can pick them up all over the place."

Artie sat down on the nearest chair. "And you didn't think to tell me this even after all I said about Midas."

"You just said that he stole a jewel," Artemus pointed out. "How was I supposed to know you were talking about a diamond?"

"So you do have some precious stones?"

"Of course, emeralds, rubies….."

"But not diamonds."

"No, but of course they are worth something. People use them in cutting tools. There's just no need to steal them, that's all."

"Well you realise that this explains everything, don't you," Artie said.

"It does?" Jim said.

"It's obvious," Artie said. "My Walter Shelby is coming to this dimension to collect diamonds and sell them back home. He could make a fortune."

"But how did he know about the diamond situation before he visited this dimension?" Jim asked.

"Well," Artie said, "if you're going to split hairs."

Jim smiled.

"There might be something to what he says," Artemus said, a thoughtful look on his face. "What if our man is not working alone?"

"What difference would that make?" Jim asked.

"He could be working with someone who has knowledge of this reality," Artemus said cryptically.

Artemus stared at him blankly. "Who has….?" Then he and Jim both said "Loveless!"

"Of course," Artemus said. "When he changed places with the President of California he could easily have found out that diamonds are worthless here. He would probably have done something about it too, if he hadn't been sent back with no way of returning."

"Until he met up with Shelby, who had access to our reports," Artie said. "That's how he found out that we had the mechanism for inter-dimensional travel on the Wanderer."

"And he sent Shelby to steal it in broad daylight, under the effects of the diamond elixir," Jim finished for him.

"I still don't understand why your Doctor Shelby stole out Doctor Shelby's blueprints," Artemus said.

"Don't you see? Artie said. "He spent so long on developing the improved method of travelling between dimensions and the diamond elixir that he didn't have time to produce his own blueprints. To stop the Government asking questions he had to steal the ones that he was sure his counterpart would have been working on."

"It's all starting to make sense now," Jim said. "But we still don't know where to find Walter Shelby or Doctor Loveless."

"Where is the largest number of diamonds to be found?" Artie asked.

"In Wyoming, I guess," Artemus said. "That's not too far from here so it wouldn't have been hard for Doctor Loveless to have found out about it when he was here."

"I suggest you go back to your own dimension now, Artie" Jim said. "We can handle this from here on in."

"Are you joking?" Artie asked. "And give up the chance of laying my hands on Doctor Miguelito Loveless? Besides, someone has to take him back to his correct dimension."

"He has got a point, Jim"

"In that case the more the merrier; I guess the fact that you know his evil ways better than us would be helpful."

"Let's head for Wyoming then," Artie said. "Which way is that in this dimension?"

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	8. Chapter 8

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 8

" **I don't really belong in this dimension"**

 _A moment later_

"Hold on," Artemus said. "It might be better if we split up."

"Yes," Jim agreed. "We can't be sure that both men will be in Wyoming. Loveless is our biggest threat and we ought to warn President Loveless that his alternate is back. You should stay here, Artie, and bring him up to date on what is happening. Artemus and I will see what we can find in Wyoming. We can't let Shelby have time to make more of the diamond elixir or we'll never catch him."

"I can't say I'm happy at being left behind," Artie said, "but I don't even belong here so I don't have any say in it. If either of the men turn up here I'll send a message to the Wanderer and hold fire until you get back. It might be interesting to get better acquainted with your Loveless and Doguelito. Let me know if you need me."

The agents shook hands with Artie and then left. Artie made his way back upstairs to the President's apartments. Loveless came to meet him and invited him into the sitting room where he had been earlier.

"Well, Mr Gordon, have you come to tell me what is going on?"

"Yes, we've come to the conclusion that this is all a plot to make money from diamonds."

"Diamonds?" the President queried. "But they are practically worthless."

"That may be the case in this dimension but in mine they are incredibly valuable."

"And how did Dr Shelby find out this fact?"

"I have to warn you that it involves our Doctor Loveless," Artie said.

Loveless seemed surprised by what Artie was telling him. "How worrying," he said. "Where are your fellow agents now?"

"They've gone to Wyoming to try and stop Shelby from obtaining diamonds so he can make more of his elixir."

"And they have left you behind."

"I'm here to protect you. If Loveless travels to this dimension he will automatically come to where you are. It's one of the rules. He may already have come and left if he was using the elixir at the time."

"I see. But why did you stay and not one of them?"

"Well, they are partners after all. I don't really belong in this dimension."

"No you don't do you," Mr Gordon?" the other man said. Suddenly there was a gun in his hand and it was pointed at Artie. He felt a presence behind him and he turned to confront the large bulk of a woman he recognised – Kitten Twitty. She looked at him remorsefully as she wafted her handkerchief in his direction, releasing a rose-coloured knock-out gas in his face.

Taken by surprise, Artie staggered backwards and collapsed handily on to a nearby couch.

"Well done, Kitten," Loveless grinned. "You have gone some way to redeeming yourself in my eyes."

Kitten smiled shyly at him and twittered.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _A Small Town in Wyoming_

Jim and Artemus had lost no time in travelling to Wyoming. The town closest to the diamond field was called 'Joyless' and it certainly lived up to its name. The buildings were mean-looking and not well kept. The general store had very little stock and there was no saloon, only a cheap eating house that served beer. The boys found that out while eating a hurried late lunch. They decided to check out the only hotel the town boasted because they decided the boarding house wouldn't afford their quarry enough privacy. Enquiries there revealed that a man fitting Shelby's description had booked a room there several days before.

Having shown the reception clerk their identification, they found out that Shelby was in room 17 and they climbed the stairs to approach his door as quietly as possible. The clerk had not been able to confirm Shelby's presence at the hotel but whether he was there or not they wanted to gain access to his room.

Jim positioned himself in front of the door and motioned to his partner to stand to one side. He then removed the lock-pick from beneath the lapel of his jacket and made a professional job of using it. He opened the door slowly and then peered inside. As soon as he was sure the room was unoccupied he motioned to Artemus to follow him inside.

Shelby's possessions were scattered around the room. The agents began a systematic search and soon came across a map and a letter.

"Look at this, Jim," Artemus said. "It looks like we were right about Loveless being mixed up in all this. Here's a letter he sent to Shelby telling him where the biggest diamond field is in this part of the country and instruction on how to inject the green liquid to enable him to travel between dimensions. The coordinates are written on the map. We should get going."

Jim nodded and then he had an idea. "It's possible Shelby left some of the diamond elixir in his room," he said.

"But we already searched it," Artemus pointed out.

"Maybe we weren't looking hard enough," Jim replied scanning the room. "Ah!" he said and moved swiftly across to where a painting was hanging slightly askew. Jim lifted it carefully down from the wall revealing an indented shelf just big enough to a vial of green liquid and a small hypodermic syringe. It was not what they had been looking for but there was also a small vial of clear liquid which was.

"This will limit his chances of getting away from us," Jim said pocketing the items.

"Ha hem!" Artemus said holding out his hand.

"What?" Jim asked.

"I think I'd better take care of those," was the reply, "considering how easily you get into fights. We wouldn't want them damaged or you being accidentally skewered on a hypodermic needle."

Jim reluctantly removed the items from his pockets and handed them to his partner with an 'I'm not amused' smile.

"Thank you," Artemus said, placing them in his own pockets. "As my great aunt Maude always says…Great jumping balls of St Elmo's fire."

"I thought it was you who always says that."

"I've just spotted Shelby out of the window and he's headed over here!"

"Quick, hide!" Jim said, concealing himself behind a curtain while Artemus crawled under the bed, remembering at the last moment to protect the glass vials in his pocket and not to stab himself with the needle.

Shelby entered the room whistling to himself and carrying a carpet bag which he threw onto the bed. The agents held their breath while they heard him undo the bag's clasp and pour the contents into the bowl on the wash stand. From the noise it made it was easy to guess that the bag had contained diamonds.

It was not a massive haul but they realised it was as much as Shelby could carry at one time and also that. If you wanted to transport something between dimensions you had to carry it with you and Shelby would surely fetch more later on. President Loveless had described the diamonds as lying on the ground just waiting to be picked up. Between them he and Doctor Loveless would be able to carry the equivalent of four of the carpet bags' full or maybe closer to half-full when it came to Loveless.

Before Shelby had a chance to realise he was not alone Jim leapt from behind the curtain and jumped on Shelby. The man was a scientist not an athlete and the struggle was short-lived and decisive. It ended with Jim holding him in a headlock before twisting him around and forcing him down on the bed. Once Shelby was subdued and disoriented it was quick work for Jim to tie his hands behind his back.

"You can come out now," Jim called to Artemus, "the fight's over."

His partner was having difficulty in removing himself from under the bed and was only half way out at this point.

"I'm trying not to break anything," Artemus informed him tartly. "We might need that diamond potion."

Shelby's face darkened. He obviously hadn't reckoned on his hiding place being found. He was hauled to his feet by the two agents and marched from the hotel to the livery stable where they collected their horses and hired one to take their prisoner back to the train. Once on board the Wanderer he was incarcerated in the rolling cell.

"Boy it's a good job Shelby hadn't used the diamond elixir when he returned to the hotel," Artemus said. "We wouldn't have even seen him enter his room."

"I don't suppose he thought he had any need," Jim replied. "Didn't Artie say it was pretty dangerous stuff? No point in drinking it if you don't have to."

"Yeah, that's right," Artemus said. "Talking of Artie, we should be getting back to California. It doesn't look like Loveless is in Wyoming."

"In that case he will definitely need our help guarding President Loveless. If his evil counterpart isn't here then he might very well be in California. It will be nice to sample more of the President's hospitality as well. I wonder what Artie is doing now."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	9. Chapter 9

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 9

" **Could it be Kitten Twitty?** **"**

 _California – a cellar_

When Artie came to he had a pounding headache, a dry mouth and the sound of whimpering in his ears. Was it him making that noise, he wondered idly? He had never thought he was the sort but you never knew how knock-out gas would affect you, especially when it was supplied by that fiend Doctor Loveless. Considering what had happened to him it was obviously he and not the President in that sitting room.

His mind becoming a little less woolly, he realised it must be a dog whimpering and thought of Doguelito. Loveless had better not have done anything to the little dog!

"Are you all right, Mr Gordon?" someone asked.

"President Loveless!" Artie exclaimed. Recognising the voice, he looked up and saw the President of California sitting with his dog a few feet from him. The movement caused him to rub his head in response to the resultant pain it caused him. "Ow!"

"Would you like some water?" Loveless asked. "When I first came round I was very thirsty." The dog growled and barked. "Ah, Doguelito can tell you're not the Mr Gordon from this dimension."

"Thank you," Artie said, taking the proffered flask of water. "You're right; I'm not from this dimension. Where are we?"

"That evil man has imprisoned us in the basement of the Government building," Loveless said. "He has a large woman helping him."

"Large woman?" Artie said. Could it be Kitten Twitty? The last time he had seen her was when the boat she, Loveless and Antoinette had been escaping in had sunk. But he knew that Loveless had survived because he had captured the agents since then and shrunk Jim and Princess Wanakee down to six inches tall. The little man claimed he had escaped drowning by reversing a physical law so that what went down must come up. Antoinette had also survived so there was every chance that Kitten had too. Then his brain cleared and he remembered that Kitten had been the one who rescued Doctor Loveless from the Wanderer the last time he visited this dimension. The only proof of her involvement was a piece of paper that was left behind with a double X written on it, with a period after the second one. Her actions then must have gone some way toward Loveless forgiving her for her previous betrayal, as he had definitely done so, or he wouldn't have brought her with him this time.

"What are you going to do, Mr Gordon?" the President asked.

Artie ran his hands through his hair. He still didn't feel too good but he had a lot of responsibility on his shoulders. Jim and Artemus could arrive at any moment and if Doctor Loveless fooled them into thinking he was the President then there would be no-one to foil his plans. He had to get moving. He stood up and stumbled to the door.

"Locked of course," he said

"I've already tried that," the President told him.

"Yes, but you haven't tried this," Artie replied, removing a small, hard pellet from his belt buckle and rolling it between his fingers until it became pliable. He placed it in the lock and then removed a fuse from inside his belt and pressed it into the softened material. Then he produced a match from his pocket, struck it and lit the end of the fuse.

"Get you head down!" he said just before the lock exploded and the door flew open. Artie ran to the door, motioning President Loveless to follow him. As he went through the door a large fist met his face head on and he shot back through the door and onto the floor.

Kitten Twitty looked down at him with a pained expression. "Oh dear, Mr Gordon," she said, putting her hands over her mouth. "I'm so sorry, but you shouldn't have tried to escape."

While she was looking down at the unconscious man the President tried to sneak past her. She put out a hand and placed it on the top of his head, stopping him in his tracks. "And where do you think you're going?" she asked, turning him around and pushing him back into the basement where he sat down with a thud. No-one noticed Doguelito run out of the room and up the stairs.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Upstairs in the President's Residence_

"Someone rid me of this wretched cur!" Doctor Loveless said, trying to stop Doguelito from growling at him and being only partially successful as the little dog took to barking at him instead. One of the guards looked into the room to see what the noise was about. He knew the President loved the little dog and it was strange to see it barking at him so vociferously. Loveless realised that he was drawing attention to himself and quickly picked up the noisy animal and began stroking it. He squeezed its paw surreptitiously and it let out a yelp.

"Ah, as I thought," he said, "it must have injured its leg. That's why it's barking so loudly. You can go back to your post."

The guard departed and Loveless took the dog to the bedroom and shut it in the closet.

Jim and Artemus happened to be in the corridor when the guard emerged and had heard Doguelito barking.

"What's going on?" Jim asked the guard.

"The dog went mad growling and barking. But it turned out it had just hurt itself, that's all."

James turned to Artemus. "I don't like the sound of that," he said. "We were worried that Doctor Loveless might turn up here and I've never known Doguelito to growl at the President."

"Like the way he growled at Artemus. That dog can spot a ringer in an instant. Do you think that's Doctor Loveless in there?"

"I think we should take care until we're sure."

"What do you want to do?"

I'm going to see the President or whoever he is. I think it might be a good idea if Doctor Shelby were to come back from Wyoming. Do you think you can manage that?"

"Sure, but I'll need some time."

Jim turned to the guard. "My friend is leaving now so there's no need to mention to anyone that he was here," he said.

The guard nodded. "No problem," he replied. He knew that Mr West and Mr Gordon were good friends of the President so he trusted them.

Jim knocked on the door and entered the President's office.

"Good day, Mr President," he said.

"Mr West, how good to see you again. What did you find out in Wyoming?"

"Not much," Jim replied, taking a good look at the man in front of him. He really couldn't say for definite that it was not the President. But then he had been unable to tell Artie from Artemus, his partner and friend, so that wasn't saying much. "There was no sign of Walter Shelby so I left Artemus behind to keep a watch out for him. We need advance warning in case he heads here."

"Good, good," Loveless said, thinking hard.

"Where has Artie got to?" Jim asked, cutting across his thoughts.

That was one question that Loveless had a ready answer for. "He left to go back to his own dimension," he said.

"Really? When I left he seemed quite keen to see the whole thing through. In fact, he refused to go when I suggested it."

"He had a change of heart, presumably. Whatever the reason, he decided to return. I myself helped him so I know he's gone."

"Well, I guess you're right," Jim agreed. "He probably had a good reason. I'm just surprised he didn't send a message to the Wanderer."

"He knew you would return here and that I could tell you about him leaving. He wished you good luck with catching your quarry, by the way."

"I just wish I'd had a chance to say good-bye. He was a great help to us."

"Perhaps you'll see him again one day."

"Perhaps. Where's Doguelito by the way?" Jim asked, looking around him for the little dog.

"I asked one of the servants to take him for a walk," Loveless said. Drat the man, would he never stop asking questions? "I expect you'll want to be on your way."

"No, now that Artemus has gone, I think I ought to stick around. It's still possible that Doctor Loveless might turn up here."

"I think that possibility is quite remote but, if you insist on remaining here then the least I can do is invite you to dinner."

"That's very good of you, Sir."

"Yes it is isn't it?" Loveless whispered to himself, beneath his breath.

"Pardon, Sir?"

"I said I'll have to speak to the chef."

"Thank you."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

The two men faced each other over the dinner table. There had been little conversation so far. Loveless was ruminating on the part that James West might play in his plans. He had never had the opportunity to come up against this particular version of his adversary. Would he be as imaginative and elusive as his own James West? If he attempted to thwart his plans then he would be forced to kill him. It wouldn't give him quite so much satisfaction as killing the original though.

James West was himself deep in thought, though he kept a wary eye on the little man opposite him. He was almost certain it was Doctor Loveless sitting there and not the President. He hadn't believed what he'd heard about Artie. He would never have left there without contacting Jim and Artemus first. He suspected that he was being held prisoner by Loveless somewhere and only hoped that he was all right. As to the fate of the real President Loveless, he had no way of knowing if he was still alive. He had a feeling though that Doctor Loveless would find it impossible to kill someone wearing his own features. He was too much of an egotist for that.

There was a female serving the food, a large woman with a sweet face. She seemed rather nervous but Jim couldn't decide whether that was because she was one of Loveless's minions or just because she thought she was in the presence of the President of California.

Loveless gave a small cough and Jim looked away from his plate and up at his host. Kitten had heard the pre-arranged signal and slipped a few drops of a knock-out drug into West's coffee. He thanked her as she handed the cup to him, took a few sips and then noticed that Loveless's face was getting bigger and smaller in turn. He tried to stand but ended up collapsing onto the table. He grabbed the tablecloth as he slumped to the floor and the last thing he was conscious of was the little man's maniacal laugh.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	10. Chapter 10

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 10

" **What the….?"**

 _California – the basement of the Presidential Building_

Jim groaned and put a hand to his head. Then he heard and felt the presence of a chain around his wrist. "What the….?" He said.

"I'm afraid that's my fault," Artie's voice came to him out of the fog in his brain. "I destroyed the lock on the door so Loveless had us chained up to stop us escaping. How are you feeling?"

"Ask me tomorrow," Jim replied. "It'll take me that long to come up with an answer." He ran a hand through his hair in an attempt to kick-start his brain. Then he tried to move and realised that there were chains around his ankles as well. "What the…?"

"Same reason as before," Artie said. "I'm sorry you ended up down here as well."

"Down here?"

"Yes, we're in the basement of the Government building," President Loveless said. "I was conscious when I was brought down here by a large woman."

"Kitten Twitty," Artie supplied.

Jim looked at him questioningly.

"Ah yes, I forgot, you haven't met her. I don't know what Kitten Twitty is doing in your dimension but in ours she's one of Loveless's minions. My Jim reckoned that she once famously carried Loveless around in a carpet bag."

"That's why Loveless brought her here then. He needs someone to carry diamonds back for him and he couldn't bring too many people with him. He must know about the danger of unbalancing the dimensions. It also explains the drugged coffee."

"You were drinking coffee?"

"Yes, Loveless invited me to dinner. I suspected he was not the real President but I didn't know he had decided to dispose of me."

"Good grief, Jim. What were you thinking?"

"Well I only had the evidence of Doguelito growling at him to put me on his scent. I couldn't be sure he was Doctor Loveless."

"Is Doguelito alright?" the President asked.

"I don't know," Jim said. "I haven't seen him. I'm sorry, Sir."

The President looked crestfallen but then he looked up at the two men and when Artie saw his expression it was just as if the evil Loveless was in the room. "If he has harmed my dog….."

"I wouldn't worry," Artie said. "I've known him a while and he would never harm a living creature, except humans of course."

"Thank you for that, Mr Gordon, I feel a little better now."

"I wish I did," Jim said, looking a little green round the gills. "What did that woman put in my coffee?"

"Close your eyes!" Artie suggested. "You don't want to bring it back up, not the way you are chained up."

Jim groaned and did as Artie said.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _Upstairs in the President's Residence_

"Kitten," Doctor Loveless said, "I want you to go to Wyoming and help Dr Shelby. The diamonds need to be crated and shipped here by train. He's taking far too long and I want to get out of here as soon as possible."

"What about the prisoners in the basement?"

"You can help me deal with them when you get back."

"You're not going to kill them are you?" Kitten asked with a quiver in her voice.

"Of course not," Loveless replied. He knew Kitten had scruples but he needed her physical strength to help with his plan, so he had to keep her sweet. "I need to know I can trust you, Kitten."

"Of course you can, Doctor," she all but cooed, love for him in her eyes. People were always so cruel to her but the Doctor understood and was kind to her. Look at the way he had forgiven her after she let West and Gordon escape. She had been so foolish.

"I'm glad to hear that, Kitten, now don't let me down."

"I won't, Doctor."

Loveless watched her leave the room and then chuckled to himself. "Now I can go to the basement and have some fun," he said. Just then he heard Kitten's voice.

"Doctor Loveless, oh Doctor Loveless!"

With a frown Loveless turned and saw her enter the room again.

"Dr Shelby is here," she said and behind her Loveless saw the grey head of the man whom he had thought was still in Wyoming.

"Shelby," he said, moving toward him. "Have you got my diamonds?"

Shelby slowly removed his hat to reveal his grey hair, which matched his moustache and neatly trimmed beard. He waited for some reaction from Loveless.

"Well, spit it out, Shelby!" Loveless said impatiently."

"The crate is at the railroad depot," the man said, sure now that Loveless had not spotted his imposture. It had been a matter of seconds to render Doctor Shelby unconscious but took a lot longer to prepare a mask of his features. The hair had also been a pains-taking task. "I had to leave Wyoming in a hurry; Artemus Gordon showed up, poking his nose in."

"Didn't you see Mr West?"

"No, was he there too? He must have left before I returned from the diamond field."

"Yes of course. You had no trouble evading Mr Gordon?"

"No, the diamond elixir saw to that. He never even knew I was there."

Loveless chuckled but then a look of frustration came over his face. "If only I could employ the substance myself," he said. "But my calculations have ruled it out. It's not the air friction but the speeding up of the metabolism that is the problem. Someone with my physical limitations would soon find his skeleton so racked that it would cause multiple dislocations."

So that was it, Artemus thought. That was why Loveless had had to pose as the President so that his presence in this dimension wouldn't be noticed.

"Yes, I too find it a little wearing on my old bones," Shelby said. "We must remember that Morgan Midas was a man in his youth."

"Quite," Loveless replied.

"By the way, where are the Secret Service agents? I know Mr Gordon is in Wyoming but there were two others running around," I believe."

Loveless smiled. "I am holding them prisoner in the basement of this building. Don't worry," he added at the (fake) look of alarm on Shelby's face. "They can't escape. Mr Gordon thought he could and got as far as blowing off the door lock. But Kitten was there to prevent his escape. Now they are chained up."

Shelby looked across at the big female. He had never seen her before but he supposed that Shelby had. "Well done Kitten," he said.

"Miss Twitty to you, sir," she replied.

"I beg your pardon," Artemus said.

"What do you want me to do now, Doctor Loveless?" Kitten asked. "Now I don't have to travel to Wyoming."

"Why don't you go down to the railroad depot and have the crate of diamonds brought here. We can leave from the President's laboratory. Oh, and before you go, I've just remembered that I shut his dog in the closet in his bedroom. Would you mind letting him out and taking him to the kitchen for something to eat?"

"Of course, Doctor. Poor little Doguelito! I'll see to it at once."

Kitten sped out of the door in the direction of the President's bedroom and Loveless looked at Shelby.

"She's been a great help to me and she will be even more help in carrying the diamonds back to our dimension. But she is far too squeamish for the job we need to do now."

"What's that, Doctor Loveless?"

Doctor Loveless grinned at him. "Why disposing of those meddling agents of course. I'd be pleased for you to join me in the basement….unless you don't have the stomach for it either."

"On the contrary, I've been wishing to meet Mr Gordon again for some time and to make the acquaintance of Mr West. Shall we go?"

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

To be continued


	11. Chapter 11

**The Night of the Obvious Solution**

Chapter 11

" **You will be forced to take me seriously, Mr Gordon"**

 _California – the basement of the Government Building_

"Good day, Mr West, Mr Gordon, President." Loveless greeted his 'guests' in turn. "You and I met for the first time today, Mr West, so I bear you no animosity, especially as my plan has been successful. I can afford to be generous where you are concerned. Mr Gordon, however, has meddled in my affairs too many times over the years and by sheer luck…" Here Artie guffawed. "…as I say, sheer luck, he has managed, along with his partner, to thwart me at every turn and caused me to endure more than one term of imprisonment. I shall show him no mercy therefore."

"Aw shucks!" Artie said. "Should I be more frightened of you or your friend Shelby?" he said, nodding toward the man standing in the doorway behind Loveless.

Once he had stopped feeling bilious, Jim had told his fellow prisoners about Artemus having taken Shelby's place. Artie had to admit that if Jim hadn't told him he would never have known. Artemus must be using a full-face mask. Damn he was good and by extension so must he be. They were after all the same person, though in different dimensions.

"You will be forced to take me seriously, Mr Gordon," Loveless said, angrily.

"Never!" Artie replied. He kept his eyes on Loveless so that the little man wouldn't notice that Artemus was taking a sip from a vial of clear liquid. He had seen the liquid in action before so didn't bat an eyelid when "Shelby" disappeared, unlike the others who couldn't hide their surprise.

Loveless turned to see what had caught their attention and noticed that his colleague was no longer behind him. "Shelby! Where are you?" he shouted.

As far as Artemus was concerned Loveless was no more than a living statue as he quickly unlocked the prisoners' chains with a lock-pick. Loveless watched as the chains fell to the floor.

"Nooooo….!" He said, stamping his feet, having realised what Shelby had done. "What are you doing, Shelby, you fool? Stop it!"

"Not Shelby," Jim said, advancing on Loveless, Artemus Gordon. "Looks like you lose again."

"I should have got Kitten to poison you two, not just knock you out," Loveless said.

"Yes, but you never learn, do you?" Artie said.

He and Jim used the chains to restrain Doctor Loveless. The president walked over to the bound man.

"And you'd better not have hurt my dog," he said menacingly.

Loveless said nothing but emitted a snarl as he was led away. Artemus reappeared at that moment to receive the thanks of his fellow agents.

"We have to find Kitten now," Artie said.

"The last time I saw her she was heading to the kitchens with Doguelito, to find him something to eat," Artemus informed them.

"Right, Artemus" said Jim, "You and I will take some of the diamond elixir and we'll go and restrain Kitten. You take Doctor Loveless and the President to the laboratory upstairs. We'll meet you there."

Artie nodded. "Come on," he said, dragging his prisoner out of the room. The President followed them.

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _The President's secret laboratory_

Variously sitting and standing around in the President's laboratory were the three agents and their captives, Doctor Loveless Kitten Twitty, and Walter Shelby, who had been brought from the Wanderer. The President was getting the equipment ready for their transfer back to the other dimension.

Kitten Twitty had been physically restrained before she even knew what was happening to her. She had struggled to free herself at first but once she knew that Doctor Loveless was already their captive she had given up. She wanted to be at his side no wonder what the outcome.

"We have to work this out," Jim was saying. "There are three of us and three people to transport. I suggest that we each handcuff ourselves to one of them. That way they won't be able to get away when we arrive in Artie's dimension."

Artie and Artemus nodded in agreement. Jim turned to Artie.

"You and Artemus will arrive back at Shelby's laboratory because that's where you left from," Jim said. "I will end up wherever my counterpart is at the moment. Hopefully he'll be able to help me. For that reason I'll be handcuffed to Doctor Loveless. You take Kitten and Artemus will take Doctor Shelby."

"Okay, Jim," Artemus said. "Then you and I will meet on the Wanderer to travel back home. I'll make sure I bring more of the Presidentium with me from Shelby's laboratory."

"Good idea," Jim said. "Now let's see if the President is ready for us."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _The Wanderer in the our dimension_

Jim awoke from his journey to find himself on the floor of the varnish car on board the Wanderer. His counterpart had been sitting drinking a glass of brandy and reading the New York Times. After hearing a loud groan he looked down at the man sprawled on the floor and then held out a hand to help him up.

"Thanks," Jim said, standing up and smoothing his hair. Then he looked around him. "I don't suppose you've seen a villainous, little man running around here?"

"You don't mean Loveless do you?" James asked surprised, the description fitting only one person of his acquaintance. "Don't tell me he's behind the theft of the blueprints."

"Only in a round-about way," Jim said with a smile.

'Boy, I really am charming,' James thought.

Then Jim frowned. "I had hoped that he would accompany me back here," he said revealing the handcuffs hanging from his wrist."

"Ah, I see," James replied. "You've found that the little megalomaniac is more difficult to bring to justice than you imagine."

"That's the gist of it, yes. I'm assuming that Artemus has had no better luck in bringing Kitten Twitty back with him."

"So Kitten's involved too. It's quite like old times. He must have forgiven her for helping us escape."

"That's what Artie said."

"Where is Artie, by the way? I assume he's alright." Although he said it easily there was a slight tensing of his jaw muscle as he waited for a reply in the affirmative.

"Apart from the fact that Loveless kept up chained up for a while and being knocked flat by Kitten Twitty with what he described as a right hook, he's perfectly fine. He and Artemus were expecting to return to Doctor Shelby's laboratory."

"It sounds like he's had quite an adventure. I glad I wasn't there," James replied with a smile of his own.

'Boy, I'm charming,' Jim thought. "I hope you don't mind but Artemus and I have arranged to meet up here in order to go back together to our dimension. He's bringing some of the liquid from the laboratory with him."

"That's fine. As you'll be my guest until then perhaps you'd like something to eat."

"Yes thank you, my dinner was interrupted quite rudely by Kitten putting knock-out drops in my coffee."

"You didn't fall for that one did you?"

"I'm afraid I did."

"Okay, I'll fix us something to eat." Jim winced. "From the look on your face you're as bad a cook as I am. Don't look so worried, it will be left-overs from something that Artie cooked earlier."

"That's alright then. I'll take these off while I wait." Jim dangled the handcuffs in the air. "It doesn't look as if I'll be needing these now."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _The Wanderer a little later_

"Jim! Jim!" Artemus burst onto the Wanderer with Artie in tow.

"I'm here," Jim said, appearing from the direction of the galley. "James and I were preparing to make coffee."

Artie quickly pushed past the other two men and hurried to the galley. "James, don't," he said. "Leave it to me."

Jim and Artemus looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"Well, Jim, did you have the same experience as us?" Artemus asked.

"If you mean that I ended up here without my prisoner then yes. I guess the same thing happened with Kitten."

"Unfortunately, yes. We'll never find them either because we don't know the location of their starting point which is presumably where they returned to."

"It's bad news but it could be worse," Jim said. "Are we sure that Loveless doesn't have any more of the Presidentium?"

"Don't worry, I tricked Doctor Shelby into revealing that the bottle we found in his hotel room was all they had apart from what was still in his laboratory and which is now in my possession. We'll need some to help us return home but we should leave the rest with our hosts."

"What are you going to leave with us?" James asked, bringing in a tray of fresh coffee at that moment.

"The rest of the green liquid from Shelby's laboratory."

"Shouldn't we just destroy it?" Artie asked, entering the varnish car.

"It would be better if you arranged for it to be stored securely," Jim said. "You never know if you might need it – but only with President Grant's sanction."

"That makes sense," Artie said. "Well, gentlemen, it's been a pleasure working with you but once you've finished your coffee you should probably get back and report to your Colonel Richmond. You can tell him that our Doctor Shelby won't be bothering him again. He's in the hands of the police and will be locked up for a very long time."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

 _The Wanderer in the alternative dimension_

"It's wonderful to be home and to be Artie again," Artie said, sipping at his glass of whiskey. "Despite the fact that Loveless and Kitten escaped, we have completed our original assignment successfully. We discovered who stole Doctor Shelby's blueprints and we have returned them after sharing them with the alternative US Government. We have also made sure that the culprit will go to jail."

"I can tell you're very pleased with yourself," Jim said.

"And why not? Colonel Richmond has granted us two weeks' leave as a 'thank you'."

"Do you want us to spend it together?" Jim asked.

Artie looked at him. "Well I'm not going to spend it on my own. I've had just about enough of 'my own' company."

"I quite liked the alternate Artie."

Artie positively hurrumphed. "What do you mean, 'quite liked'?" he demanded. "He's me!"

"No, he looks like you. But I don't know him that well."

"Oh."

"Unlike you, whom I like a lot."

"Oh."

"Now, can you stop saying 'oh' so that we can get on and plan our vacation?"

"I guess so. And, Jim."

"Yes?"

"I like you a lot too."

"Oh."

ooooooooooo0ooooooooooo

The End


End file.
